You and Me

// Thursday, October 28, 2010 11:16 PM

Went to boat quay for a camp cohesion tonight. Was walking along the streets with lots of pubs, eski bar, and rmbed the time we walked to lao pasha and took our photos for FCUKERS FAM. Singapore river, Singapore lane tower. memories came along. Miss the time when our common dreams was still that sweet and simple... Sometimes, till now i still can't believe this sudden and huge unexpected turnover that changed my life tremendously to the deck of my life. I guess i was just too closely attached and too comfortably relied on you in the past and that causes the sides effect i have now. But i started to have this feeling tat although i still loves u, although i hate the feeling tat im experiencing everyday, I choose to remain single like now... just remain as tat. I wan to wait, and see a bigger picture of the world and wanting to know if my belief for a relationship all along is correct. I still rather choose to be a guy that get hurts rather than hurting others. I guess tat still suits me the best...

// Tuesday, October 26, 2010 2:46 PM

Sick, din complete my gym routine. Unable to take mc. Haven night class today and camp duty tml till thursday.endure bah. Listening to my frens talking about their gfs. Rmb how I affirmed them tat I wun last with this gf and told them sweet stories about 2 of us. And I always had sweeter story than them. I always tht I was the most blessed guy in the world.I found the best gal in the world who I would do anything for, who I want to live forever with.I tht she was the happiest gal being my gf. Apparently not... I'm angry at myself, life became so fucked up because of a gal. I really want to get over everything soon. I'm too used to her existence, at the same time I learned to be more independent. John asked me to be a bigger dog in r/s, dominate r/s, be the cruel one since this is how gals hurt us messed up our life to a miserable one, how other guys snatch his gf. Sounds so right, but its wrong. I know tat feeling, I dunwan to hurt other ppl. I will get up to my normal life again myself...although I dun trust a lot of things anymore...hope to get a nice sleep tonight.need to recover for wed. Oh ya, and have to thx kl for fufilling her promise to pei me this wed. Thx so much.((=

// 5:50 AM

Got a cut on my finger suddenly, wonder where did I got the cut. So many things left unsaid in my heart.I'm tired le, sick of everything le. Just let it be bah...everything I will just pass it.just let everything be how it wants to be... Its ok if I can't get out of my own memories, as long as other will be happy, tat will be gd enough le. Its night time again.

// Monday, October 25, 2010 12:37 AM

"I love you" stars, u came out again after so long. I miss u so much. But this time, I feel heartpain seeing you. Are u still shining for me? Good night everyone... Tml will be a better day. Jiayou to u too. U done nothing wrong. No need to scare of those stupid ppl spreading words around.childish idiots.

// Sunday, October 24, 2010 12:21 PM

Revolving around that name, wats the use, wats the purpose? can i get myself up? I want to get myself out of this. How i wish i can wake up tml and find out that everything is just an illusion playing in my mind. if its true, get me a long-term painkiller and let me get numb of all these pain... 没有地球太阳还是会绕,没有你我多难过也是要继续走下去...

// 10:41 AM

I have finally freed u, gave u freedom u want. Woke up in the morning, realising that my life routine have changed completely but I still have to face this world no matter what. I had been a very silly guy, even such sweet gal like u also dumpped me.I dreamt of u again, without fail every night.I hate tat... So tired but I can't seems to fall asleep again.I don't want to stay home. Finding a place to wonder? Where should I go out with my memories today? Should I go that place? I scare I can't take it...eat well for lunch and study hard alright? Good gal... Will we have chance for ni-hon mura again? Haha. So random. Its the start of the day. Jiayou you and me!

// 12:19 AM

Went to westmall today, after class. Went for a walk. Din want to think but felt tat every corner I walked was filled with our memories. Still rmb, tat was the place, while we were walking to the mrt station, I assured u again I would bring u to every part of singapore like how I promised u I will, when u were one person in sg. We still have not explore every part of singapore together yet, but I guess u are chasing for a bigger world already. I love u so much, and I trust u so much. No one knw would had ended up like this. But at least, I wish to know, I was a gd bf to u. 很可惜，我们到了最后还是没能在一起。你给我的只有一个没有你的未来的选择。不过，谢谢你，晓雯，这段回亿好美.你是我这辈子到现在，爱得最深的女人。我们在一起玩闹，一起的乐事，我会永远记在心里，陪伴着我一起走到未来。谢谢你…自少我们成经轰轰烈烈的爱过。

// Thursday, October 21, 2010 3:28 PM

One have the ability to changes ownself but it does now changes other. Time is the most cruel thing in the world. Im hating so many things now. hating love, hating r/s hating gals. But ultimately, i myself is the culprit to hate most. Because i brought all these to myself.Where am i gg to head now? I really hope to stand up for myself. Can anyone still be trusted in this world? I dun even trust myself cuz im lying to my heart to forget you...你为什么没发现我对你的心是永恒的？我真的感觉你是最特别，我们的爱是最独一的。没有你的日子，真的好难挨. You are still as stubborn as ever, sticking to ur principle. You killed the man you once loved so wholeheartedlly, You killed the man who loves u sincerely.

// 1:23 AM

I'm fucking fucking angry at myself!! Fucking angry. I dunwan to live as myself anymore. Can I?

// Monday, October 18, 2010 12:17 AM

The wind has lost its objective, lost its purpose and motivation to continue blowing...which direction should it go nxt? It is lost in the mid air, searching for his kite again...

// Thursday, October 14, 2010 10:42 PM

Ah ma, get well soon, dun make everyone cry for you... After u recover, we bring u to hk, taiwan, fly kitr... All as promised... Just get well soon...

// Tuesday, October 12, 2010 11:38 PM

Have slot to acomplish before I ord.updating my to do list.:)

I'm trying...

// Sunday, October 03, 2010 10:47 AM

Time cannot be turned b, what passed have passed. U are gone. I can't blame u, i cannot be so selfish. I din't do well as a bf so i shouldn't force u to stay at my side anymore. Yong Hwee will have to stay up and walk again.

我很爱你的家人；他们很热情很温馨。很遗憾我不能进一步的爱它们了。愿你们平安，永远开心，身体建康。我还是会继续每天为你们祈祷的。Baby sam, grow up well, be like your xiao gu, a sweet, caring and independent lady:)